Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent

junipersky

Old sci-fi from say… pre 2000’s, I give a little bit of a pass. Yes, annoying af, but I figure they are parroting their upbringing.

Post 2000’s?! That is just WILLFUL misogyny.

Also, side rant. I somehow ended up on straight white man with a grievance against LGBTQ+ issues tok, and I do not like it. They are so sneaky and start out like they are going in one direction but then pivot into bull shit, so I watch most of the video so TikToc feeds me more of the same even though I hit the block button on the creator!

Pyrephox

@junipersky I hate that. I had to do some industrial strength algorithm pruning on YouTube due to liking RPGS + computer games + history. This apparently means I desperately want neckbeards telling me how women ruin everything, and a whole bunch of Nazi-adjacent nonsense. And even after you block and say ‘stop showing me this’ and get it pruned down?

All it takes is one damn ‘crossover’ sort of video before it all comes flooding back.

helvetica

@junipersky ngl a lot of my algorithm is just videos of koalas slowly being cute. it’s times like these that I’m grateful.

crawfish

Dealing with the nuclear bomb that is stage 4 pancreatic cancer in one of my favorite people to walk this planet, I gotta say it makes you plug all the energy leaks in your life very very quickly. When people say they no longer have tolerance for bullshit when things like this happen, it’s a thing. Feeling guilty for having any kind of joy is a thing. Feeling a desperate driving urge to drop everything and fly across the country to try and not feel useless as the person you love and their family drown in the real, heartbreaking, fucked up tragedy of it all is a thing. So I’m sorry I’m not around. I’m sorry I’m quiet. I’m sorry that all of my focus is on something so harrowing and important; I have to bear witness to this. I’m not going to choose anything different.

ETA: I can’t keep screaming with my family about this, so the void of the Internet will have to do.

Testament

@crawfish With things and real issues such as that, I don’t believe there’s any need for an apology required.

Do what you need to do.

Cornpopped

@crawfish I’ve been exactly there. It sucks so much. Screw anyone who can’t give you some grace right now.

Coin

It’s a harrowing experience. I know how you feel.

TNP

Yeah, fuck cancer.

Wuff

Waiting weeks for the new lenses in your existing frames to be put in. I remember when reading wasn’t mean to give you headaches.

velma glasses

WhiteRaven

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Jennkryst

@WhiteRaven I don’t know if this counts or if it helps or whatever, but.

I don’t know if it’s some level of undiagnosed bipolar or just the ADHD that we for sure know about, or if it is a third, mysterious and unknown thing. But I unintentionally ghost people from time to time, either because I just don’t have the energy to log back into places, or I worry that I’ve annoyed people TOO MUCH by trying to stay in touch despite not really hanging out on the same games so I stop talking, but then has it actually been TOO LONG since I talked last? It would be weird for me to break the silence. Lets just let it go on for a little longer. Apologizing for the silence is awkward, maybe we pretend it never happened.

… rinse, repeat, ad nauseum. To the point I have a job application sitting in my car, waiting to snail-mail in to a job that just might finally get me out of the dumb restaurant, but… I’ve had it for so long. It would be weird to send it. Or scheduling car maintenance. Talking is hard, the car won’t break if it goes a little over in milage. What’s that, you say? 5,000 miles past the ‘next oil change’ recommendation, you say?

Uh, where was I? Right, ghosting.

So it might not be ghosting. It could just be ‘things would be weird’. So maybe give her a fresh reach-out/poke, because it could just be a mixup. Unless she specifically told you to fuck off, but that doesn’t sound like what happened.

Pavel

@Jennkryst Not going to diagnose or anything, but that description pings every ADHD sensor I have. So you can definitely use that label if it helps you.

Sanguine

@Jennkryst Well I suddenly feel both seen and called out all at once. Thanks. I think.

Jennkryst

@Pavel oh, yeah, I got the ADHD diagnosis like… 30 years or so ago, so no worries about overstepping there. It’s more a question of WHAT ELSE. But that costs money, gonna live in chaos instead.

Pavel

@Jennkryst said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:

It’s more a question of WHAT ELSE.

In my experience the answer is, what we professionals call, fucking everything.

Jennkryst

@Pavel Well, yeah.

Trash Therapy

Pavel

@Jennkryst Oh, if you want the answer to that… it’s probably your parents.

Roz

@WhiteRaven said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:

I know that I don’t deserve any explanations or think that I’m entitled to know what happened or why.

Don’t you? I mean, naturally we all talk about how we all don’t owe random RP acquaintances explanations for everything, like not wanting to RP with someone or talk to them. But there’s a difference between random people on a game you barely know, and someone you’ve been friends with for eight years.

As others have said, there could be any number of reasons for it, and I don’t know the particulars of your situation. But I think it’s also okay to acknowledge that, even if something was accidental, or not intended, that it can also have been hurtful and unkind. I at least don’t live in a world where a friend of eight years doesn’t deserve any sort of word of explanation when the other friend disappears. (With the usual caveats, yes, if someone is abusive/toxic/unhealthy/etc., you do what you need to get out of a bad situation.)

WhiteRaven

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TNP

@WhiteRaven There is, of course, a possibility that has nothing to do with you in any way. You did nothing wrong. You aren’t being ghosted. Things happen to people. It’s entirely possible they are unable to contact you due to various reason that don’t really need to be elaborated on.