@junipersky That’s fantastic! You’re doing a great job. Just remember in your moments when you see her disappointment or are overwhelmed, you are human and you are allowed to be learning during this process as well.
What we did that helped is use the word ‘consequence’ instead of ‘punishment’ and then limiting screen time rather than physical discipline obviously or sending them to their rooms.
There will be a lot you realize after the fact that you beat yourself up for not knowing, but again you’re learning too. What matters is you care enough to be there. Every kid is different and every journey is different.
As for the toothbrush/hairbrush thing YES we had that duh moment too. We have realized the more choices they have or can help with the better. They pick what snacks go in their snack drawers each week. Sometimes it’s the same stuff sometimes it’s new food. They pick what scent soap they want for their bathroom. They pick Youtube, Movie or Roblox for family time at night.
Anyways I’m rambling. That affirmation goes a long way for you too so I know that must have felt good to receive. In case you haven’t gotten it in awhile, you are doing AWESOME and keep it up!