After nearly 26 years of off-and-on struggle with college — and a whole list of unresolved mental health issues going on at the same time, beginning with my biological mother’s death and the subsequent mixed family drama almost a year after that — I am, today, August 1 2025, officially in possession of a Bachelor of Science degree in Computer Science. (Today is my conferral date.)
It’s been a long road.
I don’t have a horse in the Star Wars MU* race, but I do have a very vested interest in not hearing after the fact about how underage porn happened on a MU*.
(And yes, I do consider it EXTREMELY LIKELY TO OCCUR when underage characters and players are permitted on a MU* with an R-rating.)
You are setting yourself up for potentially serious consequences. So let me make it clear:
DO NOT ALLOW UNDERAGE ANYTHING
@HannahBananna said in Silent Heaven: Small-town Horror RPG:
@Pavel Thankfully if you had any of the four you’d be smart enough not to start shit with someone who’s obviously always been above you. This ain’t my way of asking. My way of asking was going onto the discord server and politely asking, like an ADULT, something you are STILL proving you’re incapable of being. This is my way of continuing to be an adult and taking away the toys of people who want to be spoiled brats. Like you. Daed.
If this is your way of being an adult, you have a very misguided definition in your mental database.
@Roz said in People Doing Things:
i don’t know if most arx folks have noticed the number of code contributions @dvoraen has made to arx, but i have
@Ashen-Shugar So let’s see if I can explain why I disagree with a metaphor. This is how your point comes across, to me:
I own a building. A crime happens in my building. I’m culpable for the crime because I own the building.
So I suddenly am expected to a) track what goes on in the building; b) had any control whatsoever about what happens inside the building.
That’s ridiculous, and most certainly not how it works in today’s society, otherwise companies and schools would be liable for the mass shootings that happen inside their areas. It’s an absolutely absurd take.
I reject the idea that I need to tacitly monitor everything that happens on a MU* I run because someone might do something illegal. That’s like saying I should wiretap my neighbors because they talked about where to hide a corpse, because I live in the same apartment complex. Oh no, they did something bad, clearly I need to have been more responsible to make sure it didn’t happen so I could tell the cops, to the point of being unethical and invasive in my methods!
No.
Preface: This is not a request for sympathy, forgiveness, or even understanding, because I have no right to ask for any of that.
To start off, I’m posting this because my brain will not shut the fuck up about it even over a week later. I’ve tried to distract myself from it, but the issue will not stop harassing me. It keeps resurfacing. I do wonder if it’s a byproduct of being on the autism spectrum and/or ADHD (and the fact I really take rejection hard), but I don’t know. All I know is that I have to get this off my chest.
I’m not going to answer questions about the details. I’m deliberately leaving out the who and where and focusing solely on the what. Some of you already know about this, because you were involved and/or can guess from my username, which I use in multiple locations (Discord and more), but I don’t want to sweep what happened under the rug and assume everything will be fine. Because it’s not, in the abstract.
Anyway, to make a long story short, I had my first experience with being disinvited from a game. I still can’t really identify what it was I said or did that led to me being approached and told I should go because of my conduct that made other people uncomfortable. There were no sexual propositions or anything of the sort, but the discussion was that my conduct on channels as a guest and during chargen had been noted, and the sum of it led to me being effectively asked to leave.
I was absolutely shocked and anxious over it, sitting in my chair reading that, because no one had voiced any explicit concerns to me saying there’s an issue until that moment, but at the end of the day what mattered was that I did something that bothered other people to the point that staff had to get involved and say this isn’t the place for you. My response was “Alright.” and that I’d take my leave, and I logged off right after.
I can only remember talking on public channels and paging three people, two of which I’ve spoken to multiple times on other games and/or Discord. One of those two explicitly asked me when I was getting my butt approved. I’ve come to the conclusion that matters have silently changed with the second of the two, and as such I needed to keep my distance from them, including Discord. So I chose to silently break contact, left DM groups, and have tried to not interact with them.
Anyway, I peeked at the game site, got the message my site was blocked from the portal, and wondered why I went there in the first place, even if it was just to hit the logout button. It was a stupid thing to do, but I still did it.
So yeah. I did something, the aftermath is bothering me still, and the worst part is I still can’t identify to myself what behavior of mine is the problem.
That’s all.
I don’t feel like copy-pasting from MSB, so I’m just going to go into recent history as I can remember it, with a few special mentions.
UPDATED - Feb 11, 2024
Current
Inactive
Past
* Everywhere I transplanted Svoran (most of them WoT games), it was for character research. “How does he think and react to X situation?” In my personal writing, Svoran is the one character where I could not get into his headspace without character research. Plus, I could not figure out how grumpy he was on average, and to whom, why the fuss, etc. I think I’ve finally figured him out, but this was a 20+ year endeavor to iron him out into his current form in my writing.
MU*ing has been a godsend with figuring out character mindsets, to the point I stopped doing character research because my writing felt more mature as far as figuring out how to write people as people, if that makes sense? But for a while, I was playing some characters from my personal fiction of Aldera to try and figure them out. The irony of this is: THEY ALL CHANGED DRASTICALLY DESPITE THE RESEARCH. (Now, they’re nothing like the “researched” versions were.) Go figure.
@crawfish I think I speak for a lot of people when I say this:
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
I LOVE THEM
I just want a tl;dr of what dragon colors and styles mean, since I haven’t read any Pern books.
@somasatori said in Everworld of Darkness:
you had me at “alien gods”
Don’t we just call them eldritch horrors and assume tentacles?
My pillow fort involves a pillow and me being covered by a blanket with my head parked on said pillow. On a comfortable surface, ofc.
@KDraygo said in General Video Game Thread:
@dvoraen Is Among Us as fun to play as it is to watch people play?
Really depends on your lobby. I imagine I can dig up some of the clips from Arx folks’ shenanigans (after I get home) because there were some lolsy moments.
I think with people you know who won’t REEEEEE too much - I am kind of guilty of that but I tried not to show it - you can get some quality entertainment.
@bear_necessities Me toooo, for playing there.
It was not my first game, tho.
@Solstice said in Missed Settings:
I’ve spent the better part of the last year utterly gobbling up everything in Brandon Sanderson’s Cosmere (Stormlight Archives, Mistborn, Warbreaker, etc.) catalog, and I am so freaking sad that there don’t seem to be any Cosmere-based games.
Having an already-established world with a well-thought-out magic system that you can do tons of interesting things with?
It would so be my jam, right about now.
I have more than once seriously considered trying to make a RosharMU*, no lie, but I get extreme imposter syndrome from it.
(Plus wtb all the deets on Voidbinding and the Unmade, pst.)
@Jumpscare The db and ndb attributes are AttributeHandler objects, to my recollection, and it’s my understanding that using db in particular will automatically handle the database-serialization and synchronization for you. Which is why I feel like I’m forgetting something if move_to() invocation is what fixed the DI problem in question.
@somasatori said in Character Death:
@MisterBoring said in Character Death:
you’d want to go with the Game of Thrones approach to death
So a wedding AND a funeral!
The funeral IS the wedding. And vice-versa. (In GOT.)
@Jumpscare Welp, I had the wrong definition of serialization in my head on top of that! So that didn’t help anything.
However, isn’t Evennia’s memory model for ORM supposed to also handle updating the database when you use the attribute handler? I feel like I’m missing something as far as the “disconnect” in location is concerned. I haven’t touched Evennia stuff in a while, so likely I’m forgetting something too.
@sao said in Character Death:
I love rping eulogizing a dead character. Non-sarcastic. I got a lot of practice at this and discovered I really enjoy it. Real characters are best, I also did a spider funeral at one point but that was for specific IC reasons and I had fun with that too.
I want a eulogy from Aureth now. 
