@64bitjedi I think you’ve been pretty mild-mannered given the coal-raking. It’s hard to be in your spot, and I can appreciate that, and I can respect that you came here to face the music in a townsquare format, not because I think that’s such a highly respectable thing to do: I think it’s the bare minimum, but you seem to be the only Staffer from your game to do that.

I can also appreciate that you have a tangible investment of real labor hours in this game, an emotional connection to it, and a vested interest in the community. Most of the people on this board don’t, and so it’s effortless and quarrelless to dismiss the entire thing as unsalvageably bad without having to contemplate all the good times you’ve likely had there.

I have no doubt that Staffers who clearly have known the whole time that they were acting in bad faith went to extraordinary lengths to keep their bad behavior and problematic incidents from you; as a coder, giving you as few reasons to get involved in anything but coding is in Cujo’s best interest.

When I hear terms like “investigation” in reference to something like this, an online game, I don’t know, that just makes me laugh. You’ve read this thread, and as kept-in-the-coder-dark as you might have been, you know the vibe of your own game. You know the character of the people that you co-staff with. Either you believe the claims of egregious, absofuckinglutely untenable harassment and abuse of power, or you don’t.

So let’s assume that you do believe them, because I’ve never seen this many claims about someone who was innocent, like ever, ever, ever, so let’s assume that you do: now what?

Do you have the authority to get rid of Hadrix? To disempower him from a Staff bit? To ban him from the game? If you had that authority, would you use it? I’m willing to bet that if Cujo is headwiz, you can’t get rid of him.

This is where we’re stuck. From the longevity and pattern of behavior described on this thread, I don’t see much chance for a rehabilitation of Cujo or Hadrix’s behavior. Any changes will be short-lived, and why shouldn’t they be? They’ll have gotten away with it. They say a few contrite words, hush up on Public for a couple of days, or weeks, and it all blows over.

Your players, the people here, folks are telling you that doesn’t cut the mustard.

Continuing to support Hadrix or Cujo in any way, and I believe that includes continuing to provide support for a game in which they have not been punished or disempowered, as good as your intentions are and as good as you say your intentions are, that makes you an enabler. And that’s what I think some other folks are trying to tell you, and frankly, I agree.

fuck cancer

I don’t think the issue of sexual harassment in MU* treads any new ground, and I think you’re absolutely right that cool-headed third party brain needs to chill out when that’s the issue on the docket.

Demanding receipts is problematic for lots of reasons, not the least of which is that it’s hard for me to think of a woman, any woman that I know, who hasn’t been in a conversation they were fine with that suddenly took a turn. YOU KNOW. A TURN. And I’m sure this happens to men, to non-binary individuals, and to folks of all identities, but I can only speak from my perspective.

If I’m in that situation (I have been), then now in order to prove to Random Cool-Headed Third Party that I’ve been harassed, or that this person is a danger, I have to show the four pages of kinda steamy texts that were fine with me before the Alleged Creepazoid got weird as hell.

Yay, that’s so fun for me, people will definitely NOT call me a slut or act like I deserved it, or shame me in any way. This never happens. Thanks so much, RC-HTP! You really helped. Wew. Not it.

I’m staring at the Discord server for a game where something Sort Of Gross happened. It happened once, and then there was a weird reference weeks later in an OOC conversation that made me think of it again, and I think to myself, “I should really mention this. That was weird. Weird as fuck.”

I know I’ll get asked for logs. I know I’ll get grilled over the conversation before and after, which I just don’t really remember that well. I’m sure my machine logged it, it logs everything, but do I really want to dig it up, and hand it over, so some strangers I don’t know can pick apart everything that I might have done? This person is more well-established in the game than I am, more interconnected into the community.

Knowing all of that, the whole situation screams Why Bother, and I feel kind of disappointed knowing that this dude will probably make someone else feel kind of weird. Explosively harassed or violated? No, nothing like that. But explosively harassed or violated isn’t what it takes to turn someone off from a game. Sometimes all it takes is someone making you feel kind of weird, and people who are not tightly ingrained in the community and who might not have someone to turn to and say word about it, they might just leave instead of hanging around and dealing with it.

one of my little idiots. my swaggletooth underbite champion. I’d murder for her, I wouldn’t even hesitate.

not to shitpost but can we get that talking fedora back in here, I want to hear the latest hot take on how this is reasonable.

@helvetica said in JKER Temporarily Banned Discussion Thread:

Listen, Darkest Timeline @Pax

I will only be responding to Darkest Timeline Pax henceforth tyvm.

being more interested in a game than a game is in you. that’s all. that’s the peeve.

If I set, and you don’t say shit, greet, or even notice my character in your first pose, take off your coat because we’re fighting.

@GF I don’t have any advice. This is above my paygrade. I’m not a therapist or even an expert at human-ing. But when I have been in similar situations as the one you’re describing, I find myself pulling away, because when I did not do that, when I allowed myself to become a support for that person who was showing me those red flags, they become very clingy and expectant of my time and my emotional labor, and that was not a sustainable balance for me. I wish you the best, it’s a tough situation.

IDK a lot about the wet mop in question, but what bums me out is how challenging it is to balance the “assume positive intentions” mindset that makes RPing with folks over the internet a lot smoother against the absolutely legitimate concern-edging-paranoia that the person you’re talking to is actually a corrosive manipulator, gaslighter, and abuser who is just waiting for their moment.

Sometimes that shit just takes a lot of spoons, man.

@CuriousGamer Until OP is willing to answer any question at all, the preponderance of evidence suggests this is more abusive fuckery, so leaving it or not leaving it becomes symbolic.

Either we’re okay with letting people use the forum to perpetuate more abuse because we want to be hands-off, or we’re going to draw the line somewhere and kick some shit out and yes, it will require judgment calls. I trust the admin to make those judgment calls in good faith, I trust the community to hold them accountable.

This is what abusers do. They humiliate you by showing everyone that you were OK with what was happening up until a point.

This log wasn’t posted to convince us of anything. It wasn’t posted to make Macha look better. It was posted to humiliate someone she felt humiliated by, because she was rejected and reported.

If y’all wanna leave it up, that’s above my paygrade. I’m here to sit in the peanut gallery, I do not want your job and I’m grateful that you do it. Howeeeeeeeever:

There’s nothing wrong with walking back a previous decision and saying “sorry guys, we were wrong, turns out that this was in fact a genuine effort to provide clarity and context”. No one’s gonna burn you at the stake for that. That’s the kind of transparency and accountability I think everyone wants, but not at the cost of letting the paraphernalia of abuse hang out in the lobby.

I get how tempting it is to try to create standards that will encompass every situation. That speaks to the tech product egghead in me. But part of moderation is going with your gut, there’s always a human element.

Tough situation, I trust you guys to make the right call. All this sucks. Just sucks. I feel so bad for whoever NAMEREMOVED is. I just feel like protecting them is more important than protecting an anonymous rando who won’t answer any questions.

IDK a lot about the wet mop in question, but what bums me out is how challenging it is to balance the “assume positive intentions” mindset that makes RPing with folks over the internet a lot smoother against the absolutely legitimate concern-edging-paranoia that the person you’re talking to is actually a corrosive manipulator, gaslighter, and abuser who is just waiting for their moment.

Sometimes that shit just takes a lot of spoons, man.

@NaderElShammy get back here I just wanna talk

lmao nevermind stay mad

@Adora

“I’m sorry, that’s not what I meant”
“I know but let me explain why that’s what you meant anyway–”

This is not productive discourse. The horse is dead. Leave it alone.

This is why people are reluctant to advertise their games. Jesus Cracker Jack Christ.

@Bessarion said in Why is Pack closing?:

Rex/Sovereign can and will (and has) come crawling out of the woodwork, and god knows who he might drag with him.

I’m gonna regret this, I’m sure, but: who?

ETA: I found out and I regret it.

@GF Eh. I like WoD but it definitely brings out the weirdos. It’s usually the vampires being edgelords but say that too loudly and suddenly it’s a competition.

This is like listening to grandpa tell war stories.