Someone sent me an unsolicited message saying they liked my RP and
itās nice
Someone sent me an unsolicited message saying they liked my RP and
itās nice
Firstly, huge hugs/good vibes/prayers/whatever you like best sent your way. Iāve been in the ER for anxietyā¦ a lot. Probably over ten times at this point.
Secondly, it sounds like this isnāt your first rodeo with anxiety, but if it is, hereās what you do. First, do everything in your power to curb avoidance of what is making you anxious. Avoidant behavior makes anxiety really, really bad (source: in recovery for severe agoraphobia). Second, see a psychatrist asap. If you canāt see a psychiatrist, see your primary care doctor. Be open to them about whatās happening and ask for medicine. If you have an addictive personality or a history of substance abuse, make sure theyāre aware of that before they prescribe you any benzodiazepenes. Having anti-anxiety meds will help you stabilize so you can move on to the third and most important stepātherapy.
Youāre probably gonna have to do therapy. It sounds like you may need to do some intensive therapy. Find a specialist in cognitive behavioral therapy. Cognitive behavioral therapy, along with exposure therapy, is an extremely effective method of treating anxiety and depression, which it sounds like you also have.
None of this is easy. If it were, I wouldnāt be a half-employed lawyer who struggles to bill 15 hours a week and who needs her parents to drive her places at 33 years of age. It frequently REALLY SUCKS. But itās doable. Iām making huge strides in my recovery.
Youāve got this. If you need to DM someone who has been through this shit, whether to ask for advice, chat about it, or just scream directly into a sympathetic ear, Iām here.
Iām rooting for you.
I kind of feel bad for her insofar as it really felt like she was totally out of her depth both rhetorically and emotionally, but being out of oneās depth emotionally doesnāt mean other people should have to put up with your relentless diatribes.
I always lean towards āforgive and let back in when possible,ā but in this case I think āwhen possibleā would be āafter some hard evidence indicating serious work on emotional regulation.ā
@Wizz said in Stupid Memes:
how am I both completely blown away and yet not surprised at all by this information
Iām gonna need Brits to harden the fuck up when it comes to rats (seriously?) and geese (understandable, but youād still WIN).
Everything after goose is just maniac shit.
ETA: having dealt with geese and cats both, Iād like to say that people are wildly overconfident re: housecats if theyāre that concerned about geese
Very few people who did not grow up as girls are fully aware of this problem. These stories are heartbreaking, upsetting, and horrifyingly frequent. Threads like this help inform people largely unaffected by the issue and help inform people in these kinds of situations that they arenāt alone and that help is available.
My only comment on here is that Concordia is about seven cities from seven worlds that got dropkicked into an alien planet 60ish years ago, at which point giant holes in the sky opened up and started barfing out Serious Issues.
This does not conform to the Standard Model, is all Iām saying
Iām being very vague on purpose here, and Iām not going to elaborate.
I play on a game where someone is playing a minority character. The way they are playing that character strikes me as not quite right. It feels stereotyped and almost offensive. It does not feel natural to me.
Iām not a member of that minority. I definitely donāt have the breadth of knowledge to even guess as to whether the player is a member of that minority. I have very vague vibes that make me uncomfortable, and because Iām not directly affected by the portrayal Iām unwilling to get others involved.
āBut Rinel then why are you talking about it hereāā Because this is venting and itās a situation where I feel guilty for any action I do or do not take and I want to vent about it.
I think youāre doing the thing I do where you try to make sure you donāt offend people by mixing in humor, but what ends up happening is people canāt easily tell what youāre joking about and what youāre not joking about, and so misunderstandings happen, and so you try to use more humor to defuse the situation, and then more misunderstandings happen, and now oh gosh things are getting out of hand
Anyway, I can understand why youāre annoyed at piecemeal changes to rules being made, and I can believe that you werenāt trying to toe the line. But what staff told you seems fairly obvious, and so an accidental misunderstanding on your part could definitely be seen as intentional.
Communication sucks.
My stance on MJ is that if you use it, you should make an effort to commission more artists in order to offset the harm youāre contributing to. The ability to pump out āgood enoughā images is a huge problem for artists, and itās going to make art the exclusive domain of the wealthy again.
Thankfully, for now, midjourney et al are fucking terrible unless you want a human in an extremely boring pose, but given the rapidity of their development I doubt it will stay that way.
Anyway, yeah, Iām ok with placeholder art for characters via MJ (though I think @Faradayās absolutist stance against it is more coherent and principled), but if youāre playing that character for more than a month or two itās time to start looking for commissions, imho.
@Testament said in Real Life Struggles/Support/Vent:
I donāt know if ADHD falls into some kind of spectrum or not.
It is part of an extremely broad category of executive dysfunction. I donāt want to say spectrum in particular, because that sort of indicates that things like ADHD are on one side and things like OCD on the other. Some people have both.
Ask me how I know.
Though our understanding of psychiatry is not really advanced enough for us to do much more than diagnose people based on syndromesāwe canāt point exactly to where something is going on in the brain and say āah, well, thatās why your executive function is wonky.ā
@DrQuinn said in Silent Heaven: Small-town Horror RPG:
-I basically canāt play it due to the whole āidle out on grid and bad things happenā bit. I have kids and I work and so I have constant sudden interruptions even if I have carved out some time to play. And yes, sometimes (too often) those things are so sudden that I donāt even have time to hit the pause button (that I am glad was installed). I have been EXTREMELY lucky that most people are cool and seem to understand that part sucks and have returned me to the hotel room each and every time, but it instills an anxiousness in me OOCly that I really, really dislike. It takes me out of the game. It bleeds into RL in a way I really hate because after dealing with an emergency or any sudden, stressful situation I have to be like oh fuck, I need to run to log into this game and hope something hasnāt happened that Iād need to deal with IC while I was RLing and sit there and hit the buttons and wait to get back to the hotel so I can just sign off.
Having played a bit more, I wanted to come back to this, because itās starting to really get to me. Ending a scene and logging off can become a 15-20 minute affair as I navigate the rooms to get back to the hotel. It makes it increasingly difficult to justify logging on and finding roleplay when I canāt simply dip out after a little bit. I understand the benefits of it, but itās an unfortunate roadblock for me. Iād be willing to take a substantial hit to my character, whether in terms of money or skills or anything, to be able to log out wherever.
(I realize you CAN log out wherever but then it feels like an imposition on the kindness of others, just like Quinn said, and thatās even worse.)
@Kestrel said in How dangerous is VASpider?:
Itās not fun to be stalked/harassed by a mob of racist/queerphobic weirdos online, even if you feel no shame in your identity. Also the kinds of people who would do this neednāt actually say anything about you thatās remotely true in order for it to be potentially damaging, or at the very least upsetting.
Yeah, I know.
Spoiled for gallows humor about the LGBT experience:
(This is somewhat liberatory if you embrace it, but itās still rather bleak)
@Meg said in Elysium /MUSH:
@Jumpscare you could not pay me enough money.
You could pay me enough money. Iāll write filth for enough money. Just in case any freaky billionaires are watching.
Back on topic, my favorite not-horrific part of this trainwreck is the flouncing away from the planet where baby goddess mysteriously gained her powers. Fuck you, Earth! You were mean to me about my predilection for preying upon children, so Iām going to go make a new reality!
I suppose thatās possibly better than forcibly converting Earth to this personās fetishes and paraphilias, though the creation of the Eternal Fuck-Torment Nexus is still, uhā¦
I just hope this person keeps all this shit online and with consenting adults.
Ugh. Yāall are right.
I just feel like a fucking cop.
@Smile said in MU Peeves Thread:
@Rinel This isnāt advice about what to do. But to be honest, someone /can/ be a part of a minority group and still play a PC from that group offensively.
Thatās true, but it feels inappropriate for me to police that, you know?
ETA: @mietze, for sure the only thing that it would even occur to me to do would be to involve staff. For right now, though, I think Iām going to sit and wait.
Iām being very vague on purpose here, and Iām not going to elaborate.
I play on a game where someone is playing a minority character. The way they are playing that character strikes me as not quite right. It feels stereotyped and almost offensive. It does not feel natural to me.
Iām not a member of that minority. I definitely donāt have the breadth of knowledge to even guess as to whether the player is a member of that minority. I have very vague vibes that make me uncomfortable, and because Iām not directly affected by the portrayal Iām unwilling to get others involved.
āBut Rinel then why are you talking about it hereāā Because this is venting and itās a situation where I feel guilty for any action I do or do not take and I want to vent about it.
@MisterBoring said in City of Glass - Discussion:
I have neverā¦ everā¦ drawn as complete a blank as I have for a played by for my character here compared to anywhere Iāve ever played before.
Like, ugh.
I would advise going on pinterest, finding art, and using that. The obsession with living actors is weird to me. Iāve done it, and it seems like way more trouble than itās worth. If something doesnāt fall in my lap in about ten minutes of searching, itās artstation and pinterest time.